A man went to the doctor and the doctor told him he had only 24 hours to live. He went home to tell his wife and after they both had a long cry over it, he asked her if she would make love with him because he only had 24 hours to live.
“Of course Darling.” she replied. And so they did it.
Four hours later they were lying in bed and he turned to her again, and asked, “You know I only have 20 hours to live, do you think we could do it again?”
Again she responded very sympathetically and agreed to make love.
Another 8 hours pass, and she had fallen asleep from exhaustion, he tapped her on the shoulder, and asked her again, “You know dear, I only have 12 more hours left, how about we do it again for old times sake?”
By this time she is getting a little annoyed, but reluctantly agrees.
After they finish she went back to sleep and 4 hours later, he tapped her on the shoulder again and asked, “Dear, I hate to keep bothering you but you know I only have 8 hours left before I die, can we do it one more time?”
Well, she turned to him with a grimace on her face and said, “You know, YOU don’t have to get up in the morning, but I do!!!”
Lawyer Won’t Leave This Woman Alone On Her Flight. What She Does Next ls Genius.
A woman and a lawyer were seated next to each other on a flight from LA to NY. The lawyer asked if she would like to play a fun game.
The woman, tired, just wanted to take a nap, politely declined and rolled over to the window to catch a few winks. The lawyer persists and explains that the game is easy and a lot of fun. He explained, “I ask you a question, and if you don’t know the answer, you pay me $5.00, and vice versa.”
Again, she declines and tries to get some sleep.
The lawyer, now agitated, says, “Okay, if you don’t know the answer you pay me $5.00, and if I don’t know the answer, I will pay you $500.00.”
This catches the woman’s attention and, figuring there will be no end to this torment unless she plays, agrees to the game.
The lawyer asks the first question. “What’s the distance from the earth to the moon?”
The woman doesn’t say a word, reaches into her purse, pulls out a $5.00 bill and hands it to the lawyer. “Okay,” says the lawyer, “your turn”.
She asks the lawyer, “What goes up a hill with three legs and comes down with four legs?”
The lawyer, puzzled, takes out his laptop computer and searches all his references, no answer. He taps into the air phone with his modern and searches the net and the library of congress, no answer. Frustrated, he sends e- mail to all his friends and coworkers, to no avail. After an hour, he wakes the woman, and hands her $500.00.
The woman says, “Thank you,” and turns back to get some more sleep.
The lawyer, who is more than a little miffed, wakes the woman and asks, “Well, what’s the answer?”
Without a word, the woman reaches into her purse, hands the lawyer $5.00, and goes back to sleep.