Colin Asks the Wine Shop About Fish

Colin asked the wine merchant for a bottle to go with fish.

She suggested a white. He asked whether it had a wide cork.

She offered a red with a wider cork. Colin took out a ruler.

The merchant put down both bottles and asked exactly what sort of fish he meant….

Colin arrived at the wine shop with a shopping list and a folding ruler.

His wife, Jean, had written milk, bread and washing-up liquid. He had added wine underneath.

Jean asked whether they were celebrating something.

Not yet, he said. But I might solve a problem.

At the shop, a woman called Eva asked whether he needed help.

Something to go with fish, Colin said.

Eva led him to the white wines.

This one is light and fresh. Very good with fish.

Colin picked up the bottle and examined its neck.

Has it got a cork?

No. A screw cap. That doesn’t mean it’s poor wine.

I didn’t say it did. I’d rather have a cork.

She found another white.

A little fuller. Still a very safe choice.

How wide’s the cork?

Eva had never been asked that before. She estimated from the top of the bottle.

Colin shook his head.

Might be a bit narrow.

She asked whether he had a particular wine in mind.

No. I’m not fussy about the colour.

For fish, I’d normally suggest white. Though a light red can work.

Does red come with a bigger cork?

Sometimes. But you really should choose by what’s inside the bottle.

Colin said that was exactly why he had come to a proper wine shop. He didn’t want to get home and find he had bought the wrong thing.

Eva offered him a small taste of the red. Colin thanked her, drank it and said it seemed perfectly good.

What do you notice about it?

Not much. Can I see the top?

She handed him the bottle. He took out his ruler.

Eva watched him measure across the neck, then compare the width with a pencil mark on the wood.

This looks promising, he said. Do you know how long the cork is?

She pointed towards a small basket of used corks beside the counter.

If you’re worried about getting it out, you can see one there.

Colin picked up a cork, held it against the ruler and smiled.

That’s the one. How much?

Eva put the bottle back on the shelf.

Before you buy anything, let’s start again. What sort of fish are you having?

Goldfish. The tank wobbles.

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